When You Can’t Help The One You Love

Helplessness: that dull, sick feeling of not being the one at the reins. When did you last feel like that –- and what did you do about it – Daily Prompt

My wife suffers from pretty bad headaches from time to time. When she gets really bad migraines she suffers so bad that the pain puts her near tears at times. She can’t function and has to just go to bed.When she gets them really bad nothing will help. Everything everyone has suggested she has tried. Some headaches are just so bad nothing helps.

At times she asks me to help her get rid of the pain. I don’t think she really thinks I can help her when nothing she had been provided medically can. But she is just in so much pain and so much suffering that I want to help her. When I can not, I end up feeling helpless and frustrated with the situation.

I wish I could just take the pain from her but I can’t. I understand that. It doesn’t make me feel any better about the situation. I’m supposed to be able to solve all the problems and make sure she experiences nothing but happiness. However all I can do in those situations is to take care of my daughter and try to make it so my wife can rest as comfortable as possible. And of course be very understanding that when she is grumpy towards me and wants to bite my head off it’s not really her, it’s the migraine.

I am just glad her headache does not get to that level often, both for her sake and mine!


This entry was posted in Bad Things, Daily Prompt, Helplessness, Love, Marriage, Migraines and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to When You Can’t Help The One You Love

  1. I suffer from such bad Migraines I don’t know if anyone has suggested this before but, I will take 2 extra strength Tylenol and then soak in hot as can be takin watch with Epsom Salt I dunk my head fully under closing my eyes and holding my nose and just before I rise back up I open my eyes and come back up I usually do this 3 to 4 times and then the migraine usually stops for me I hope this helps you.

  2. Gail says:

    I am so sorry your wife suffers like she does. She is lucky to have such a supportive husband. Though I’ve never had a migraine, my oldest son has them. He sees a neurologist periodically and is on two preventative meds and keeps Imitrex, the rescue drug, on hand.

    This was a great example of helplessness. I’ve felt it too.

  3. seeker says:

    It’s hard to think when the head hurts. Glad you are there for your wife.

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  6. mightwar says:

    It is enough for your wife to know that you are there for her. And that you take care of your child when she is incapacitated. As a fellow migraine sufferer, I can tell you that there is a lot of relief in knowing someone you trust is there taking care of what you cannot. That level of thoughtfulness and kindness goes a long, long way when you are feeling helpless and useless due to pain.

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